TL;DR Version:
Nekoyashiki seems to be at the lowest point thanks to his recent failure. Issay shows up to save the day again, but Nekoyashiki is overwhelmed by the fact that he likes Issay in a deeper way than Issay likes him. In despair, he asks Issay to never see him again because it hurts too much and Issay agrees.

Recap:
Nekoyashiki has been in bed all day because his recent effort at classic BL storyline flopped horribly. Essay messages him and is ignored. The character grabbing his own breasts on the cover of Nekoyashiki’s last successful work urges him to get up and move.

Nekoyashiki does, but it’s not going well. He’s crumpling everything he draws. After ignoring many messages from Issay, he responds that he’ll be out of touch. Issay looks pained.

Yamada shows up, trying to get him to take a break and eat. She urges him to make stuff he loves because otherwise there’s no point and fans suffer. When she tries to feed him meat directly he shoves her out of the apartment. Then her bag. Then her shoes. 

Alone again, he hits the wall and Yamada listens outside.

Later, she’s at Issay’s work struggling against security guards. Issay shows up and when he asks what’s wrong, she looks desperate and gives a deep bow. 

The morning sun hits a broken-looking Nekoyashiki, and a pitiful tear hits his latest drawing. He opens the door to Issay, who takes his hand and pulls him out.

The news guy follows as Issay drags Nekoyashiki from store to store and makes him smile, buying them matching fuzzy brown cactus keyrings. He also gets them three candied strawberry sticks, which confuses Nekoyashiki.

The third one is for the news guy. Nekoyashiki is horrified by Issay’s casual attitude and Issay wonders what the problem is. The news guy’s coworker mentions it would be interesting if Issay was a girl. The news guy says he’s done following Issay, and confirms that the candied strawberries are as delicious as they look.

With powdered sugar coating his lips, Nekoyashiki comes to the same conclusion, that it doesn’t matter because they are both men, but it hits him differently. When Issay goes for the standard BL mouth-wipe move, Nekoyashiki freaks out, physically backing away. He wants to know what Issay is thinking.

Issay likes him. But Nekoyashiki wants to know the meaning of his like, because he seems to like everyone, and Nekoyashiki’s like is different. Issay continues to keep it simple and upgrades his “like” (suki/すき) to “really like” (daisuki/大好き). 

Nekoyashiki thanks him for liking him, but he can’t do this anymore. It’s not that he’s comparing them or their past history, it’s that they’re too different. Issay’s happiness hurts him. Issay looks really sad. This is probably the only thing he can say to get Issay to go away and it works. Nekoyashiki says goodbye.

Yamada gets a call from Nekoyashiki. At first, he’s talking about the things he wants and whether he can have them, but it moves onto what he really can’t have, Issay. Yamada just listens as he cries and says that it didn’t just hurt, it also made him happy. And that it was Issay’s recognition that he wanted most. And that he hates himself for being this way.

The camera goes from one weird fuzzy cactus to the next, where Issay is looking sad out the window. We end on Nekoyashiki tearing a picture of him and Issay in half, splitting them apart.

Thoughts:

Issay has been the one to reach out and be close to Nekoyashiki this entire time, so in some ways I’m frustrated with Nekoyashiki for pushing him away yet again. Yet at the same time, I understand. Issay does seem to like him especially but it doesn’t seem like he sees him romantically and is painfully oblivious to what Nekoyashiki really needs.

In some ways I want the next episode to have Nekoyashiki approach Issay, but in some ways I want Issay to be the one to approach Nekoyashiki again. Sometimes one person is just better than the other at something in a relationship, and I think as long as both sides of the couple are giving and taking if that looks different for each person that’s okay. If Issay needs to be the one to reach out and Nekoyashiki the one to push for more, I think that’s fine.

I’m curious which way it’ll go.

I love the way this addresses Nekoyashiki being gay. He wants Issay as a man and Issay isn’t clearly reciprocating that way, and it’s really hard on Nekoyashiki. The fact that he is gay and has struggled with it is something that isn’t addressed that often in BL and could stand to be addressed more directly more often. 

Yamada continues to be awesome. If this were a longer drama I’d want to see so much more of her.

Next episode is a mystery to me. I have strong hopes that it’ll come together and we’ll get to see some of the secondary characters we’ve enjoyed along the way as well.